Sign of things to come

"Among famous traitors of history one might mention the weather."

                                                                         Ilka Chase 


AUBURN, Maine - Mother Nature has some nerve!

It's the day before Halloween and Mother Earth has conjured up a rare autumn Nor'easter and aimed it directly at Merry Ole New England.

Thanks a bunch, ma'am!

I just cut the lawn on Wednesday and now I am shoveling on Sunday. Give me a break!

I know it is not personal, but couldn't this freak of nature have waited until at least December? Why panic New Englanders who were frantically clearing out their sheds to get at their entombed snowblowers.

Like Maine doesn't get enough snow!

Being on the receiving end of a Nor'easter is no fun and it is as annoying as seeing signs of Christmas in stores across the mall in early October.

So now it's lights out for the entire northeast as tree limbs and wires come tumbling down due to heavy wet snow. It is the kind of white stuff that triggers heart attacks, not to mention depression and anxiety. Thousands have lost power and their patience.

I am mad as hell and I am not going to take it anymore even though my anger is obviously misdirected, especially when Mother Nature always has the final say in these matters.

I know ski areas will be delighted out in the hinterlands with the early arrival of a blizzard that usually doesn't appear on Maine's radar until January, but for those of us who have a low tolerance for the flaky white stuff in Maine's huge metropolitan cities, this is just a damn nuisance.

For the past few days, weathermen have been predicting 5 to 10 inches of snow. I thought they were out of their minds and their computer models were sabotaged by terrorists. I didn't pay attention to them, putting all my money on Mother Nature to pull a fast one and foul up another weather report. It is October, not January, and suddenly these guys are talking about a Nor'easter and heavy snow.

Get real!

Unfortunately, meteorologists were right on the nose with this prediction in some areas of the nation. Today, Maine and the rest of the Northeast is draped in a blanket of snow stretching all the way to Maryland and Virginia. It's not funny.

Perhaps the apocalypse is upon us - although I doubt it.

I tore open the shudders and threw open the sash Sunday morning, and what to my wondering eyes should appear but heavy gooey snow and no tiny reindeer. I heard the sound of snowblowers off in the distance and shovels scraping the pavement as bewildered Mainers dug their way out of this mess.

I shook my head and reached for the coffee, because you can't talk to me without my first cup of coffee. I am hearing impaired until I down my first cup. The world could be ending, but that would have to wait until I have my first cup of black gold, with cream and sugar, of course.

But Auburn was spared, well sort of, after this fast-moving storm raced toward Canada. We received about three inches and it is melting as I write. In two days, central Maine will become one giant puddle as temperatures soar into the high 50s.

I am not sorry to see it disappear, knowing all too well Old Man Winter isn't done with us, yet.