— Groucho Marx
AUBURN, Maine — Forget the bonuses and trophies! The Red Sox management would be doing the right thing by having the entire team deloused for winning the World Series.
Those beards have to go. Really! Get the razor out and have these ZZ Top refugees shave off their facial hair that looks like an overgrown forest hanging from their chins.
I understand team unity, but I can't image dealing with all that moss draping over my chest. I can't believe all that growth didn't distract them in the batter's box. A simple patch on my jersey to demonstrate team spirit works for me.
Can you imagine the effort required to maintain their hairy faces and the increased cost of shampoo to make sure their beards are more bouncy and manageable.
Youz guys won the World Series and dealt the Cards another loss in the postseason so go visit your local barber shop for an old-fashion shave. Youz guys can afford it.
I once grew a mustache and that touched off a round of barbs directed at me. I shave every three days to keep that Don Johnson look just in case they revive "Miami Vice."
Turn the clock back 30 or 40 years and no manager in baseball would tolerate long hair or beards that could give the sleep Rumpelstiltskin a run for his money.
According the Associated Press, the Sox will shave their beards for promotion. How about cutting it all off for fans who believe in a clean-cut, Marine appearance. You don't need a paycheck to look good. Just ask the guys and gals who serve our country.
But this America — the home of the free — and bearded Major Leaguers in dire need of a shave.
No more garden party
The garden is done and November's chilly hands are reaching out to all of New England.
How would I rate this year's crop? It was good, and as usual, some vegetables came across with the goods and others failed to produce.
That's the life of a small-time farmer who knows he is at the mercy and whim of Mother Nature — that stubborn dame of weather.
When thoughts turn to summer
I had the pleasure of covering a state cross country meet at Twin Brooks Recreation Facility, which is a wide-open swath of land that serves Cumberland and surrounding communities.
http://www.sunjournal.com/news/local-sports/2013/11/03/cross-country-running-lewiston-earns-second-state/1446583
There was non-stop sunshine as temperatures hovered around the mid 60s during the 3.1-mile races.
This facility is also open in the winter for avid cross country skiers who enjoy traversing this expansive landscape and gives me one more good reason to live in the Pine Tree State.
But you know about what they say about the weather in New England — "Just wait a minute."
The cold air has returned, and despite strong sunshine, it is damn chilly out there.
When winter closes in, I can't help but think of summer, the garden, and our adventures around the Northeast.
In late October, we visited Fort Williams in Cape Elizabeth, a wealth community littered with beautiful parks and other tourist destinations.
This is the place to go for a short hike around the former military outpost that overlooks part of Casco Bay and the rest of the Atlantic Ocean.
Pack or buy a lunch, find an open bench and enjoy a postcard view of the sea.
According to www.capeelizabeth.com, "On April 13, 1899, President McKinley named the one-time subpost of Fort Preble, Cape Elizabeth's first military fortification, Fort Williams. Named after Brevet Major General Seth Williams, Fort Williams grew to be a tremendous military asset during World War II. Besides protecting the shoreline of Cape Elizabeth, the infantry and artillery units provided the Harbor Defense for Portland. After the war, many of the forts in Casco Bay were closed, including Fort Williams, which traded in its defense of the coast for caretaker status and Army Reserve accommodations. Fort Williams was officially closed and deactivated on June 30, 1963."
"Although often a place full of runners, bikers, baseball games, and picnics, Fort Williams has managed to maintain some of its historic past. When the Town of Cape Elizabeth purchased the beautiful 90+/- acre park on December 1, 1964 for $200,000, the old military buildings became Town property as well. Along with the various batteries is Goddard Mansion. Although not in the condition it was when Colonel John Goddard and his family lived in it during the mid to late 1800s, the walls of the great mansion still stand high on the hill overlooking Fort Williams."
Pictures tell the whole story about Fort Williams, and here are few that we took in October.
Enjoy!
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